Get Back to Better!

What is normal? What is best? What is worse?

“Normal” is very subjective and is unique to each individual. A question men do not ask themselves is “What is my standard for normal?” An even better question that men do not ask themselves is “What is my goal to increase my normal standard?”

“Normal” is the comfortable routine that allows us to easily breeze through each day without TOO much harm or differentiation to the schedule or to ourselves. I challenge you to look at your life, as is, and honestly determine what your “normal” is. Then ask yourself, “Do I like my normal, or can my standard for normal get better?”

The reason for this article is I’ve heard so many men say, “I have to get back to normal.” after a break-up or an extended layoff from work or even a bout of sickness. I understand the desire to “get back to normal” because it’s easy, and comfort feels good. Nobody ever says, “OK, now that that’s over I’m going to go be worse.” You have the option to, but you don’t choose that because worse hurts, it feels bad. You also have the option to say, “I am going to Get Back to Better!” If you’ve just had your heart broken, lost a job, had the flu, or just had a bad night’s sleep, you have the opportunity to make a distinct change in your life and “Get Back to Better!”

Take a look at who you were during that relationship that ended. Are there any areas for improvement in yourself so that you can have a better, deeper, more passionate and intimate relationship next time? Look at the person who had the job that was lost. Could he be more proactive, complain less, stand up for himself more, or be less argumentative. Take a close look at the person that was lying in bed, sick. Could that person eat healthier, exercise more, or start taking care of himself as soon as there were signs of illness?

I want to note that the changes I’m suggesting are not easy ones. Most men cannot just flip the proverbial switch and, tada, they’re changed for the better! These are not simple changes but they ARE possible. So instead of “getting back to normal” why not give it a shot and “Get Back to Better!”

I Hope You’re WRONG

What if your NEED to be RIGHT is the reason everything is going WRONG?

Have you heard the saying, “You can be RIGHT or you can be HAPPY”? Or perhaps, “You can be RIGHT or you can be RICH/WEALTHY”?

Where in your life do you feel the need to be RIGHT?

“You can be RIGHT or you can be HAPPY” in a relationship.

For me, every now and again, I feel that need to prove that I’m right. That I finally remembered something that she didn’t! But did I remember it correctly, or was I remembering it from my personal point of view? I could be right from my own point of view, but does that make me RIGHT? Surely it doesn’t make me right from her point of view most of the time.

So when I’m fighting that point is it worth upsetting her and spending a day, a half a day, or two days upset and disconnected? It’s absolutely NOT worth that! We have a finite number of days on this planet and to spend it emotionally apart from the person or the people you love the most is absolutely not worth it!

Check in with yourself when you get into that arguing mindset and you’re completely in the fore-front of your mind. Do you need to be RIGHT or would you like to be HAPPY? All it takes is a moment of recognition, “Am I just fighting this point because of my feeling of my NEED to be RIGHT?”

“You can be RIGHT or you can be RICH” in business.

Where are you saying to yourself in your life, your business, or your job that it’s difficult? “I can only make this much money in this position”, or “I have no other talents that I can go and get another job”. We can be whatever we want to be! I’ve done seven different jobs in seven completely unrelated fields and I’ve been successful in all of them! But in each one I got to a point I was telling myself I was RIGHT about my boss being a jerk, or having a dead-end job, or I could not make any more money doing it…until one day, doing sales, when I thought I was making as much money as I could, and the job kinda sucked but it was paying the bills, I was shown that I could make double and work even less! All it took was a little extra training from someone who was better at it than me, a little practice and the belief that I could do it. Then I showed myself I could do it!

But until that point I was RIGHT! And I really wanted to be RIGHT that I could not make any extra money! I was subconsciously sabotaging myself when going into work every day because I wanted to be RIGHT that it was hard, that the job wasn’t quite worth the money I was earning.

So where in your life are you feeling the NEED to be RIGHT? Your mind is going to tell you, “Nowhere! I don’t NEED to be RIGHT!” So ask yourself then, where am I not 100% happy? Finances? Relationship? I will guarantee you that where you’re not feeling comfortable is where you’re feeling your NEED to be RIGHT about how difficult it is or about how someone else is treating you.

So just be HAPPY in the journey out of your NEED to be RIGHT! We can be WRONG once in a while and be REALLY HAPPY! It’s not something that feels great right away…in fact, it feels kinda crappy to accept the fact that we’re not RIGHT. It felt really crappy to me…it still does sometimes, to accept the fact that I’m not RIGHT! My body does not like to be WRONG, especially in relationships. It feels like anxiety and anger and resentment…but it has nothing to do with the other person in the relationship. It has everything to do with my desires and my NEED to be RIGHT.

However, being RIGHT or being WRONG is not the answer! Being open to opportunity and possibility is the answer. The challenge of accepting being WRONG is dealing with the shame, guilt and fear of not being RIGHT. So, what would your life look like knowing that beyond being RIGHT about your current circumstances are the possibilities of being wealthier, healthier, happier and more passionate TODAY? Since this is the case, wouldn’t you therefore prefer to be WRONG?


Kevin Scott

Effortless Alpha


Does This Sound Familiar?

I have had 6 jobs in my life, all of them lasting more than 2 years, one as high as 7. And in each and every one of them I have only risen to a level where I began working for a boss I just couldn’t stand. Even my current job. So why continue to put myself through this? Clearly the universe is trying to tell me to do it myself, to be my own boss. But what can I do? My passions are watching/playing sports and acting. Acting is hard to get paid for unless you’re “lucky” and I’m too old to get back into competitive sports, let alone train enough to be good enough to get paid. What can I do? I have no talents outside of doing what I already know how to do. What if I try something and all my friends and family think I’m an idiot for doing it. Or worse yet, I do it, it fails, then I look stupid and I’ve wasted a ton of time and money that I could have been spending on my current job…which I really don’t enjoy anymore.
Sound familiar? These are the voices in our heads keeping us from growing, evolving, and having a life that we love to live!
We can’t blame those voices though. They’re doing their job. Their job is to keep us safe. And comfort is safety.
We’ve evolved past needing to constantly be on the lookout for predators or hiding in caves for safety so our minds have evolved to protect us from “possible” harms emotionally and mentally.
The voices don’t have to control our lives, though! We have a secondary mechanism in our minds – consciousness. We can actually choose to override these voices and do whatever we want.
Most of us get around 80 years to live this life. Most of us let the voices direct us. In every moment we are making a choice: to allow the voices to win or to take action in spite of them.
Will these voices ever go away? No. They will adapt and evolve and grow so that when we adapt, evolve and grow they will try to keep us down, keep us comfortable at that next level. But we WILL BE AT THE NEXT LEVEL!
Take one step in the direction of your chosen future today. Just one.  Feel the power, the excitement, the desire for more it gives you to accomplish it, no matter how small. Embrace that feeling…and tomorrow read this again…and take another step.
Find out if the Effortless Alpha Protocol is the right fit for you. Reach out to to see how the Effortless Alphas can give you endless support.